


Unwind

by FalliciousPuns, VesperNexus



Series: Fiedler's Llamas [12]
Category: The Spy Who Came in from the Cold - John Le Carré
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Drabbles, Gen, M/M, Mind Control, but some of them have plot so shh, mind control drabbles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-08 20:37:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12261636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalliciousPuns/pseuds/FalliciousPuns, https://archiveofourown.org/users/VesperNexus/pseuds/VesperNexus
Summary: Control is so liberating.





	1. Chapter 1

"You can go fuck yourself, and your "Democratic Republic"- go fuck Karl fucking Marx-"

"You're deluding yourself, Alec. Deep down you know, you know, you know where your mind belongs. I'm helping you to find yourself."

"Stay the FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD"

"I'm helping you Alec. I'm going to help you understand that."

"I won't join you. Communism, your system, is rotten to the core."

"You have your doubts. You have them."

"No. Stay away from my thoughts. Stay awa-" Alec backed up as Fiedler advanced ever so slowly. 

"Don't resist the inevitable Alec. I'm already making you conscious of things you'd never even considered."

"Nn-o s-stop. Stop. Communism is wrong. It's wrong- it's-"

" Perfection "

Alec felt his back thump against the wall. Fiedler did not stop. 

"Alec, you know what is right. You know . You realize now that you've always known what was morally right."

"I- Fiedler, stop this-"

"You begin to see all the flaws in the capitalist system. And you understand now, don't you? You understand that everything the Circus told you about Communism was poison ."

Alec's eyebrows knit together. "No... no.... you're wrong- you must be wrong..."

"I'm right Alec. You're right. Deep down, you know you're right, because you believe in this system of ours. Ours."

"Nnn-nno... not ours- yours - F-Fiedl-Fiedler please, please stop this, I know- I know what you're doing to me-"

"Open your mind to the possibilities- open your mind to me ."

"Fiedler stop making me know these things these truths please PLEASE PLEASE!"

"Do not... resist ."

"I- I-"

"You cannot resist any longer."

"I-"

"Let your body... relax. You're so close to understanding now. There's no need to be so... tense."

"I... you're right.... I am... rather...". Leamas slid down the wall a few inches.

"Feel yourself unwind. Let yourself relax, completely and utterly loose..."

Alec's muscles fluttered, then slowly, he tottered. Jens moved forward, holding him up against the wall. They were so close.

"Now Alec. You can just relax your mind. Your mind needs rest- let it become loose- unwind- unprotected and utterly, utterly relaxed."

Alec's head fell to rest on Jens' shoulder. 

"There we go Alec, there we go. Let me in, let me help you- let you relax... even... more... completely ."

Alec's breath deepened. 

"Good... good. Now let me help you unknot those harmful thoughts that torment you. Let me clear away all the worry."

"F... Fiedler...."

"Shhhhhhhhhhh..... let all those disruptive thoughts of free will whisper away in the wind. They cause nothing but pain- a burden of responsibility that you would never choose ."

"... o.. ohh....nnhhh... how... lovely...."

"Mmmh, Alec, you understand now- you understand how wonderous a feeling it is to be free- free of all burdens..."

Alec hummed, his eyes gently shut in utterly relaxed content. This was... perfection.

"Control is so liberating, is it not Alec?"

"Quite."


	2. Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Your mind is a delightful thing Alec.” He blinked, taking a long moment to reconcile with the images thrumming chaotically through Leamas’ head. “Won't you let me open it for you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this got severely out of hand

Fiedler smiled a dangerous smile, the barest twitch of rose-red lips. He watched the way Leamas’ throat moved, relished in the quiet intake of breath as the older man took another step back.

"I don't - I don't believe in your bloody half-country, your twisted philo-"

Fiedler eased his shoulders down, pulling a thin hand gently from his pocket. "Oh, Alec. Of course you do..."

"Stop, Fiedler - just - stop - it's no use-” Fiedler slithered between the fractured edges a little deeper, “I'll never-"

The fear in Leamas’ voice was intoxicating. Fiedler forced his own heart to slow, edging his way into that troubled mind with a delicate prod. "Oh, My dear Alec... Trying so hard to resist...."

Leamas sneered, handsome features twisted. "Stop! I'll never - I'll never..." Fiedler took a step forward, consciously veiling the intrigue in his eyes with concern.

"Your mind is a delightful thing Alec.” He blinked, taking a long moment to reconcile with the images thrumming chaotically through Leamas’ head, the growing _fear-despair-anger-fear-fear- fe-_  “Won't you let me open it for you?"

Leamas’ back thudded against the wall. The man glanced around in a sudden panic, Fiedler carefully flittering into the centre of the labyrinth, smoothing out all the sharp edges.

The other man’s eyes shone feverishly as Fiedler filled the cracks in his thoughts with glue. "...No... never... Fiedler please I don't want -"

"You don't know what you want Alec. Let me help you. Let me in, Alec." Another step.

"No...No..." Fiedler’s tongue darted to wet his lip, faced lined with sudden concentration, capturing all the loose and broken thoughts threatening to chip free from Leamas’ memory. He would need everything.

"Let me in..."

They were almost chest to chest. Leamas shut his eyes tightly, strong fingers pressed into his temples.

"Nn-"

Fiedler could feel the body heat radiating through his suit. He finally reached the threads tying that complicated mind together. "Just breathe and listen to me... this is what you want, Alec."

"N-nn- Fiedler-Fiedler stopstopstop..."

"Just a little... bit... more.” He began to twist.

"I'm not..."

Oh, how he loved the sound of futility.

"You are."

And _twist._

"I-"

_There._

"Yes, Alec. _Yes_."

"I am."

 _Finally._ The strings were rearranged neatly. The tension slowly worked its way from Leamas’ elbows, his knees, the pained curl of his toes.

"I... am? What - what am I?"

 _Mine_ , Fiedler didn’t say.

"You're a Communist, Alec." His words were the perfect blend of assertion and confusion, as if Leamas was mad.

"That - that doesn't sound right... Fiedler are you-" He was shaking his head. Fiedler parted his lips, hand reaching out slowly, as if wary of touching Leamas. He spoke with a quiet diffidence, eyes focused at the space by his feet.

"Fiedler? It's Jens, Alec. It has always been Jens."

Leamas blinked owlishly as Fiedler eased the comfort and familiarity deep into his memories, replacing all the cold sharp blues with amber. His calculating voice sounded like the crackle of fire, the bite of his touch a quiet brush of shoulders.

"Right - right - of course, Jens - I'm-"

"A communist Alec. You're my friend.” _My friend,_ he weaved the words together slowly with a loom of pale yellow light. “Where is your head at?"

Leamas took a moment as his brain processed the sudden information. "... Sorry. Sorry - I don't know what's come over me."

"...That's alright, Alec. I've got you..."

"Thank you, Jens."

He smiled affectionately. "My lovely, infuriating Alec..."

"Jens!” Laughter. How lovely. “I'm hardly infuriating."

"Oh Alec,” Fiedler lowered his hand, moving slowly to the bed on the other side of the room. Leamas’ eyes followed him as he eased the exhaustion, bleeding the remnants of fear and nervousness from the man. He would be too tired soon. “You could not guess that half of it!"

Leamas stepped towards him subconsciously, led by some invisible rope around his throat. "It feels as if I've woken from some terrible dream, Jens."

Concern. "Are you alright, Alec?"

"Yes - I - I just feel so odd, like I'm not supposed to be-" He stopped, a meter away. Fiedler hid his scowl behind a delicate tilt of his chin.

"Not supposed to be...?"

"I- never mind.” Leamas blinked quickly, shaking his head. “I don't want to concern you."

"You always concern me, Alec. It is my job to be concerned about you."

"...Just your job?" Fiedler pressed his palm against his trousers.

Gentle laughter. Of course, Leamas was going to make it difficult, he thought affectionately.

"So, you have not forgotten everything then..."

A pause.

He spoke slowly. It would take more than rearranging Leamas’ strings. He would need new threads all together. "Will you come here, Alec?"

The man wasn’t looking at him. "Hmmm?"

"Just for a moment."

"Fied- Jens.” Fiedler supressed a sigh. “I think I should lie down."

"Come lie with me then, Alec.” He drew the two syllables too long, knitting them together with the shy roll of his tongue. “I've missed you."

"I've been here the whole time, Jens..."

"... I am afraid you haven't." He carefully gripped the threads in a gentle fist.

"Jens, this is ridiculous,” he swallowed, “I'll just take the couch-"

Fiedler’s voice became a little colder. "Humour me, Alec. Just come a little closer."

"I - alright."

"A little more Alec, I don't bite."

Leamas hesitated. He was close enough to touch. Fiedler held out his hand, palm facing upwards. Leamas stared aimlessly at the pale hand.

"... I know I - I just feel like I shouldn't be...” he sighed in frustration. The tension began to slowly simmer in the marrow of Fiedler’s bones as he tried to ease the suspicion from Leamas’ thoughts.  “Like I shouldn't be here..."

"You are being ridiculous Alec.” Leamas tilted his head. “Just take my hand. I'll help you."

"... No. No, I think I'll take the couch. Just till the vertigo-"

Fiedler’s smile trembled, pulling down in disdain. His beautiful features slowly twisted as he released all the threads from all the dark, wonderful corners of Leamas’ mind.

"Oh, My lovely, infuriating Alec-" A thrill crawled up Fiedler’s spine as he undid his own careful work. He had sincerely wanted to be gentle.

It was a shame Leamas had decided to be so difficult.

"Jens - what - I-" Leamas blinked, hand flying to his mouth as Fiedler trampled with heavy steps across the delicate plane of his mind, heels cracking the glass memories, throwing his thought process into disarray -  

"You should have taken my hand."

"I-” Leamas gasped, doubling over. “Jens - Jens my head - Oh God, it- it hurts I-”

Fiedler was motionless.

"Then perhaps you should not have resisted."

Leamas choked, hands pressing against his forehead "Jens what're you doing!?"

"Stop resisting.” His eyes fluttered shut for a moment, a terrible sublime feeling coming over him as he wrenched Leamas’ defences open. A kaleidoscope of colours spurted, a splatter of vivid greens and reds and yellows drowning the order of an untouched mind.

"Jens!” Breath seemed to escape him. “Nnnn - Jens please why-”

Fiedler’s fingers began to twitch as he carelessly buried the intruding wave of confusion.

"...This is taking too long."

Quick steps. "Jens - let - let go of my hand-”

He weaved their fingers together, flattening Leamas’ coarse palm against his chest.

"Do you feel my heart, Alec?" He held the man up as his knees trembled, another hand at Leamas’ waist as he collapsed.

"Fuck - Jens - my head - you're hurting me! Just stop!"

Fiedler’s neck was moist with Leamas’ tears. "Feel my heart beat against your palm, Alec.” He pressed his cold lips to the curve of Leamas’ ear. “Breathe.”

Leamas groaned, Fiedler stumbling under his weight, holding him close.

“I am sorry about this."

"Nn - what-"

"I will just breathe for both of us."

The scream was animalistic. Fiedler ripped it viciously from Leamas’ throat as he began to paint with new colours over the mess.

"Shh, My Alec, shh-"

"GodSTOPSTOP - NNHHHHHH!" He muffled Leamas’ cries into his shoulder, long fingers easily playing with the hair at the base of his skull.

"There we go...."

He eased them down slowly.

"HHAH- I CAN'T I CAN'T BREATHE -"

"Shhh... I have you..."

_There we go._

"Ahhhhh... nnnn..."

Leamas’ was heavy against him, and Fiedler didn’t dare move lest his work come undone. The floor was hardly comfortable, and exhaustion began to weigh heavily on his nerves. This was far more difficult that Fiedler could have expected.

".... I did not want it to come to this, Alec."

He spoke slowly, forcing his heart to beat shallowly against Leamas’ palm, tethering him so it would be what the man remembered as he woke.

"Hhh... hhhhhh...."

"I did not want to hurt you like this.” Fiedler pressed a gentle kiss into his hair. Leamas’ head lolled, limply. “Please understand."

"... Jens?” Fiedler had successfully destroyed the old strings. He rested his cheek on the top of Leamas’ head as he began to thread new strings through the loops. “I - everything... it's so cold..."

"You will become very numb in a moment, Alec." He knotted them, once, twice. The strings ran from the corners of Leamas’ mind right to Fiedler’s fingertips.

"... Make it stop..."

"I am sorry. I am doing this for you."

"Jens..."

He pressed his cold palm into Leamas’ sweaty one. "Just hold my hand, Alec. Remember, I will breathe for you. I am here."

Leamas nodded against him, Fiedler waning the resistance from his very being.

"I can't feel my - my toes…” He stumbled over his words, speaking too uncertainly. “My – everything’s so slow..."

"It will pass, Alec. It will pass, and when you wake, I will be here."

"Please..."

Fiedler pressed a kiss into his hair.

"I am right here. Please know I did not want to hurt you. This is for you.” He looked away for a moment. “For us."

"Jens..."

"For us, Alec."

"I..."

"Shhh, now. I won't let go, Alec. Just close your eyes."

"...You'll be... here... when..."

"Yes. Yes, Alec." He held him closer, easing that powerful body into his own. Freeing Leamas from his terrible will.

"... Jens... I..."

"Save what is left of your breath, Alec."

"Jens..."

"Close your eyes."

Silence. Leamas’ breath slowed to a calm rhythm as Fiedler drew away his consciousness with skilled fingers.

"That's it, Alec."

He smiled.

"Oh, that's it."

*

"Jens?"

Leamas’ eyes found the younger man. A smile stretched his lips as he took quick steps.

"Alec! You're up-"

"I just need to-" He weaved his arms around Fiedler’s delicate body, drawing him close. Fiedler looked up at him in surprise as Leamas pressed their lips together.

"Nn-” Leamas pulled a delightful little noise from Fiedler’s throat, feeling his companion relax against him. His mouth was soft and inviting. Fiedler looped his thin arms around Leamas’ shoulders.

Fiedler looked a touch dazed when Leamas pulled back.

"...need to kiss you."

His laughter sounded like the beat of butterfly wings in hot summer air. “Alec! You can always kiss me."

"I know but - I just felt like-” He sighed around the words, unable to explain the sudden overwhelming desire to keep Fiedler close. “I need you. Needed. Need."

Fiedler brushed his long fingers against Leamas’ jaw, thumb brushing against his cheekbone. "...You are being awfully sweet."

"Yes - I - my head's so clear. It's - it's delightful. Finally." The smile wouldn’t leave his lips. A look of satisfaction flittered through Fiedler’s eyes, and Leamas could have kissed him again for the lightness he suddenly felt.

"Oh Alec, you don't know how it pleases me to hear you say that."

Leamas moved his hands to Fiedler’s slender shoulders.

"I know I've been a bit difficult with the headaches and the-"

"It was like you were under some trance, Alec.” He shook his head. “But it has passed."

How could Fiedler be so wonderfully understanding? "I know but I'm sorry. I said some things to you and I-"

"You can make it up to me, My lovely infuriating Alec..."

Leamas blinked, and for a very quick moment, something about those words made him lost.

And then Fiedler bent his head, resting his cheek against Leamas’ collarbone. Him, Fiedler, the Cause. Together. It felt so wonderfully right.

"I will, Jens. I will. For you. Anything for you."

"... For us. For us, Alec."

Leamas smiled.

"For us."


	3. Chapter 3

"Now, I'm going to count down from ten... and with every number, you're going to become more... and more... relaxed..."

"Fiedler, you sound like an absolute-"

"Ten... you can feel the tension start to trickle off your shoulders..."

"Like an absolute... an absolute...?"

"Nine... your eyes, so tired... You want to close them, just a few moments..."

"I'm... a little tired... I'll just close my eyes a moment.... I think."

"Eight... you don't need to think... let your mind wander... let it *relax*."

"I think... I've always wanted to play cricket professionally.... there was this girl at university.... she liked putting orange slices instead of lemon... I-"

"Seven."

"Fiedler I feel.... so lovely."

"Six... the last traces of tension are leaving- you couldn't lift your arms even if you wanted to... all that's left is to relax your mind, your mind."

"Five..."

"Fiedler.... what a pretty, pretty..."

"Four..."

"...name..."

"Three... and now you feel to relaxed to even talk... everything is all so comfortable..."

"Nnh....ohh...."

"Two.... you don't need to think..."

"..."

"One... don't think for yourself... One..."

"..."

"Wonderful."


	4. Swiss Clockwork

Jens looked up, and reached out a hand until his fingers rested on Leamas' temple. 

"You have such a brilliant mind," he said, closing his eyes as if he were savouring a dish. "Like Swiss clockwork."

Leamas didn't have time to be stunned.

"Sleep," Fiedler stated, his fingers still barely brushing Alec's face. 

The man's eyes rolled back, his eyelids fluttered and fell, and his head lolled forward. Teetering, Alec was about to slump out of the armchair, but Fiedler pushed him back by the temple with a gentle thumb, tilting his head back so that the Adam's apple cut the light.

So much accomplished, and only with the barest touch.

**Author's Note:**

> **= bolded/italics  
> If I have time at somepoint I'll go back and fix it hhhdhdhdhd


End file.
